61 Honkingly Hilarious Goose Gags You Can’t Resist Laughing At

Get your laughing feathers ready and brace yourself for some waddling good fun, as we are about to embark on an egg-stremely punny adventure. Rest assured, your funny bone will not be anything but tickled as we navigate our way through a ducky-dose of funniness featuring our forever-funny feathered friend, the goose.

This hilariously honking collection of 61 quick quips and plumage-packed puns about geese will have you giggling more often than a gaggle of geese at a comedy show. Warning: further reading may cause uncontrollable laughter, snort giggling, and possible honking. So, wade in and enjoy these gags, because this ain’t no wild goose chase, it’s a one-way ticket to chuckle town!

  • Where do geese go to avoid the northern winter? Duck-ota!
  • Why was the goose so upset by his tax return? Because he had a giant tax bill rather than having a de-duck-table.
  • What do you call a gander that goes into shock when they fail to intimidate any of the other pond denizens? Flabbergooseted!
  • Do you know what they call a possessed gander? A polter-goose!
  • What do you call the capitol city in a kingdom ruled by geese? Lagoose!
  • Why did the goose join a band? He had the sax appeal!
  • What is the main antagonist in a goose’s horror story? The gobl-geese!
  • Who do geese call when one of their young goes missing? Liam Geesen!
  • What do you call geese that get scared while watching a scary movie or TV show? Goosebumps!
  • While traveling in Canada recently, I needed to get a ride to the convention center from my hotel and it may as well have been on goose back because I felt every bump on the way there.
  • Have you heard about the goose that keeps evading the park workers’ attempts to catch it? It’s a professional ducking goose!
  • What do you call it when a farmer spends an entire day trying to round up his birds? A wild goose chase.
  • What do you call geese that become really good friends? Best birds forever!
  • Do you know who was voted the sexiest goose alive last year? Ryan Goosling!
  • Why do geese do well in school? They take honking seriously!
  • Do you know a goose’s favorite form of government? Authori-geese!
  • Who is the most famous bird in Hollywood? Goose Willis!
  • I don’t think my pet goose is normal. While she was roaming the yard, a snake decided to attack her. Surprisingly, she dodged the snake’s strike and killed it in self defense. I think she might actually be a mongoose.
  • How do sports geese show their camaraderie after scoring a point in a match? They give each other goose bumps.
  • What was the reason the police gave for arresting the goose in the park? It was suspected of fowl play.
  • What do you call a goose that loves comforting others? A good sympagoose!
  • What do you call a goose that can speak both English and French? Canadian!
  • How does a goose express their love? By saying I honking love you!.
  • Which spell does a goose magician use to impress his friends? The “Honkus Ponkus” spell.
  • What do you call a bickering family of geese? A gaggle gag!
  • Who is the most famous monarch in goose history? King Goose-av III!
  • What type of a goose is often in charge? The conductgoose!
  • What is a goose’s favorite actor? Goosep Efron!
  • Why did the geese rise up against their queen? Because, as the old saying goes, no bad deed goose unpunished.
  • What is the name of the job for the baggage handlers at the geese-port? Cargoosers!
  • Why are geese never invited to play duck, duck, goose? Because even if you call it a duck, it will still chase you.
  • What do you call an exotic food dish created from panko breaded goose that is then fried and served with seasonal fresh local veggies? “Honk-atso! ”
  • Who is the most famous singer in goose culture? Goose Springsteen!
  • Why was the teenage goose grounded? Because his behavior at the family dinner disgooseted all of his relatives.
  • Why did the goose gloat about his conversation? Because he knew he could talk the talk!
  • Why was the goose afraid of waddling in public? Because it was always second-goosing itself.
  • What do you call a Canadian goose that is really good at martial arts? Goose Lee!
  • What occupation does the goose who teaches belong to? A goosecator!
  • What is a goose’s favorite fashion brand? Goosechi!
  • Why are geese such good musicians? They have perfect pi-honk!
  • Why did the goose refuse to speak with the duck at the park pond? Because he had an inflated egoose!
  • What kind of appetizer does a family of geese like to eat when they go out to eat at a fancy restaurant? Deep fried asparagoose!
  • What do you get when you cross a goose with a fruit? A Mangoose!
  • What is the goose’s favorite car to drive? Honk-da!
  • What do you call a goose that can’t control its gunshots at the gun range? A goose cannon!
  • What do you call a goose who loves art? Van Goose!
  • Why did the goose cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
  • How can you tell when a goose is stuck in air-traffic? It is honking!
  • What do you call a goose who works in real estate? A land-goose agent!
  • While we were on our walk in the park today, one of the ganders that frequent the park suddenly burst out laughing uncontrollably and couldn’t stop. One of the park staff rushed him off to the vet where the gander was diagnosed with a mild case of fungoose.
  • What is a goose’s favorite type of movie? Goose-busters!
  • What is a goose’s favorite vegetable? A squ-awk!
  • How does a German goose greet its friends at breakfast? “Goosen Morgen mein freunds! ”
  • What movie do all geese like to watch? Goose Point Blank!
  • What do you call a gander that wanders around the countryside looking at everything without any real purpose or focus? A gandering gander.
  • What does one goose call another after they perform a stand-up routine? Goose-t hilarious!
  • What do you call a goose that helps out in the legal profession? A paraleg-goose!
  • The zoo had a couple of rescued geese, but they’ve recently escaped and the zoo keepers can’t seem to find them anywhere. It’s anybody’s goose where they got to.
  • What is a gander’s favorite pie? Gooseberry!
  • What do you get when you cross a Canada Goose DNA with dinosaur DNA? A Stegoose-sauras!
  • Do you know which side of the goose’s body has the highest number of feathers? The outside!

Well, there you have it folks, we’ve waddled our way through a flock of 61 rib-tickling, honkingly hilarious goose gags that undoubtedly had you quacking up in a fit of giggles. Whether it’s a gaggle at the office or a flurry at family dinners, these jokes are plume-perfect for spreading the cheer. So the next time you feel your feathers ruffling, just remember, laughter’s always on the fly in this bird-brained world of ours! Until then, keep winging it with humor and always stay gander-ous with your laughter!