64 Hair-Raising Hairdresser Jokes to Tickle Your Humor Follicles

When it comes to hair-raising hilarity, barbers and stylists really cut above the rest. Our comically coiffed collection of 64 puns and jokes will surely snip away your blues and leave you in shears of laughter. This tailored tumble into humor is certain to tickle your humor follicles, whether you’re a master of mane merriment or a newbie to hair humor.

While hairdressers weave magic with a scissors and comb, we’re here to curl up your lips with laughter. This comedic concoction guarantees a cascade of giggles, no matter if you’re a die-hard hairdresser, a salon hopper, or just another innocent bystander. So, leave your hair worries at the doorstep, and get ready to split your ends laughing!

The rabbit went to the hairdresser searching for his friend. Unfortunately, he left disappointed because there was no hare to be seen.
My friend inherited a comb after he went bald. He said he will never part with it.
My friend likes watching football matches when he’s at the hairdresser’s. The coverage is quite similar, but the highlights are better.
Why is cutting hair a noble job? People always part with it on good terms.
Which drug do hairdressers like the most? Hairoin.
Why did the hairstylist go to therapy? Because she couldn’t cut it anymore.
A lady walks into a salon. She is wearing huge headphones which she refuses to take off. The hairdresser pleads with her to remove them to be able to cut her hair easily, but the lady is adamant that the headphones cannot be removed. After a while, the lady falls asleep and the hairdresser decides to remove the headphones to make his work easier. Some minutes pass and the lady falls from the chair. Shocked, the hairdresser checks on her and finds there is no pulse. He stands there confused trying to figure out what has happened. Curious, he picks up the headphones and starts to listen to what the lady was listening to. All he hears is, “Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. ”
I used to hate my hair. Then it grew on me.
My girlfriend came back home from the hairdresser’s. She asked me how she looked and was upset with the response I gave. She yelled, “So, you are saying I look like a bulldog! ! ”I smiled and told her, “No. I never said that. You heard me wrong. ”“Oh, sorry, ” she said as she laughed. I added, “What I said was, you look like a bald hog. ”
Hairdresser: How would you like your haircut? Me: Anything that will make me look good. Hairdresser: Oh, okay. No guarantees, but I’ll try my best.
What’s the hairdresser’s favorite type of fish? Bream, because it comes in colours.
How do vampires do their hair if they have no reflection.
What is a hair stylist’s favorite song? Can’t Help Falling In Layers.
The hairdresser had me sign a legal document the other day. At first, I was confused, but then she told me it was for perms and conditions.
Why was the hair stylist a good secret keeper? Because he could curl up with a secret.
Why did the hairstyles start a debate? To comb through different points of view.
I visited the hairdressers only to find people getting their heads shaved off with giant pruning scissors. It was shear barberism.
Barber: Would you like a haircut? Boy: No. I would like them all cut.
My friend has been searching for a decent barber ever since the hairdressers opened again. He’s looking for one that is a real cut above the rest.
Why did the hair stylist bring a ladder? He heard the higher the hair the closer to God.
Who was the hairdresser’s favorite music artist? Harry Styles.
The hair stylist had a calendar that had hair styles for every month. It was her yearbook.
He told his hairdresser a joke. He dyed laughing.
A local hairdresser was jailed for 10 years because of drug dealing. I have been going to this guy for the longest time and I never knew he was a hairdresser.
How did the first man on the moon cut his hair? He eclipsed it.
My friend does not use keys. She lost her locks.
I went into the barber’s shop yesterday and noticed he had dirty hands. He told me, “I cannot help it. No one has come for a shampoo today. ”
Why did the hairdresser bring gardening shears? He thought someone wanted a mushroom cut.
He walked into the hairdresser’s palace and took a seat. On the wall, a sign read: $70 for a haircut. He gulped. The woman assessed his hair and said, “How are you, sir? How much would you like off? ”He replied, “About $55. ”
How did the hairdresser come first in the race? She took a shortcut.
The Jamaican man stormed into the hairdressers and demanded a new style. The barber was dreading it.
What did the hair say to the barber? I just want a trim, don’t take it off the top.
What does the hairstylist do at the gym? Curling and extensions.
Why was the hairdresser suicidal? He just wanted to dye.
Why are hair stylists good at golf? They know how to perfectly teeze.
What’s a hair stylist’s favorite car? A Volkswagen Braidle.
What would Conan be called if he was a hairdresser? Conan the Barberarian.
Why was the hair stylist a good detective? He could brush through any evidence.
Why does the hairdresser love his job? Because it’s shear joy.
I was invited to a hair-washing party. I have no excuse not to go.
The hairdresser was arrested at the quarry. He was grooming miners.
Why did the hair stylist become good at soccer? She was an expert at styling kicks.
The man went into the barbershop to get his haircut. “You are going gray, sir, ” says the barber. The man replies, “I am not surprised. Now hurry up, would you? ”
What’s the name of a bad hairdresser who happens to be expensive? A rip-off.
What do people say when they enter a hair salon? I’m here because I want to dye.
Why did the hairdresser like dating? Because she could always brush off the ones she didn’t like.
What’s the name of a good hair stylist? A shear delight.
There’s a guy who put a rabbit on his head. He wanted a head of hare.
My son cannot decide whether he wants to be a story writer or a hairdresser. I guess he will have to flip a coin. Heads or Tales.
Which other names are hairdressers called? Locksmith.
The hairdresser does not cut her hair any longer. She cuts it shorter instead.
Where do hairstyles go to relax? At the fringes of society.
What is the name of a drug dealing hairdresser? El Chapo.
Why are hair stylists good at math? They know how to add volume.
How does an indecisive person get their hair cut? In two minds.
Why did the guy go to the hairstylist? Because he had a brush with baldness.
You cannot have a hairdresser as a friend. They always talk about you behind your back.
What’s the name of a group of hairdressers having a party? A barber-cue.
What is common between a hairdresser and a thief? They both cut locks.
Why did the hairbrush become a hairstylist? Because it always goes straight to the root.
The hairdresser started to breed dogs. She called them shampoodles.
What is the name of a hairdresser with a penchant for pedophilia and opera? The Barber of Saville.
She saw an advert saying, “Hairpieces for $5”. “That is a small price toupee, ” she thought.
Why was the quarterback called a hairdresser by his coach? Because he missed the split end on a curl.

And there you have it, folks! A full salon’s worth of hairstyle humor, 64 strands of snickers pulled right off the comedic barber’s floor. Whether you’re a pro with the scissors or simply a fan of the fringe, we trust these jovial japes brought a giggle to your mane and brightened your day one clip at a time. Remember, life’s too short to have boring hair, and it’s definitely too short not to laugh at hairdresser jokes! Until next time, keep those humor follicles stimulated, and may all your split ends meet with the precise snip of laughter!

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