54 Pencil Puns to Sketch Into Your Daily Laughs

Get ready to draw your funny sides and sketch some laughter into your day. Imagine this: you, armed with a simple pencil, but instead of sketching a still life or writing a grocery list, you’re about to bring forth gales of laughter and a whole heap of smiles. Yes, with 54 hysterical, pencil-themed puns and jokes waiting to be revealed from the tip of your humor, this will be an adventure you surely won’t want to erase!

Each pun and joke coming up is so sharp, you won’t need a pencil sharper. This concoction of word play and punchlines are just the right shade to add a burst of laughter to any situation. So, buckle up, because we’re about to lead you down a pun-tastic journey that’s funnier than a rubber eraser, smarter than a mechanical pencil and as welcome as a fresh new set of color pencils!

  • Why do pencils love comedians? To get their daily dose of comic sans.
  • I just wanted to make a little quip about a pencil. Whatever, there’s no point.
  • Why do pencils hate lockdowns? They can’t stand not being able to leave a mark.
  • The depressed guy said ” there’s no point, ” when he snapped his pencil.
  • Why do pencils dislike gossip? They cannot erase the things they’ve heard.
  • What state do pencils like to visit? Of course it is pencil-vania.
  • During my exam, my pencil broke. I wanted to continue with the exam, but it was pointless.
  • My pencil broke as I tried to draw a rectangle, making it a wrecked angle.
  • My house is a little sketchy looking with all of these pencil drawings lying around.
  • Why do mathematicians rarely experience constipation? They can always use a pencil to figure it out if things get difficult.
  • Scissors get a little snippy whenever the pencil makes an excellent point.
  • What is the connection between John Wick and mathematicians? They are able to solve any issue with a pencil.
  • What did the pencil point say to the eraser? Destroy.
  • Why was the pencil upset with his wife? Because she kept leaving him in the drawer!
  • When you sharpen a pencil, what do you get? A great point.
  • The other night, someone tried to sell me a pencil with erasers on both ends. I didn’t understand the point.
  • The pencil went to therapy because it had a broken lead.
  • Why did the pencil go on the roller coaster? To have a thrilling write.
  • Why do pencils find it hard to let go? Because they are so good at holding the lead.
  • An assortment of pencils believed to have belonged to Shakespeare has been discovered. They are so completely chewed up on the ends that we can’t tell if they are 2B or not 2B.
  • What did the pencil say when it got into a fight? “Come closer, I dare you. I am not afraid to draw blood!”
  • Did you know that pencils shave to look sharp?
  • Why did the pencil go to school? To get a bit more lead in its diet.
  • Can you do magic with a pencil? Yes, it can disappear behind your ear.
  • Why is the pencil never lonely? Because it always has its lead to talk to.
  • What did the sharper say to the pencil? Why don’t you come close? I need to make a point. ”
  • What are broken pencils? Pointless if you ask me.
  • What is a pencil with two erasers called? Pointless.
  • The pen only lived up to half of its name, which is the primary distinction between it and the pencil.
  • A police officer approached me with a pencil and paper and wanted me to trace someone for him.
  • What did the pencil say to its enemy? I don’t want any sketchy characters in my life.
  • Why do pencils avoid making decisions? They like to go with the flow, left to right.
  • What happened to the pencil that was hurt in prison? Mid-sentence, it broke.
  • People who draw with pencils are hard for me to trust. They are shady.
  • What happened to the finance guy with constipation? He had to figure it out with a pencil because he could not budget.
  • Why don’t pencils ever win races? Because they always draw
  • Why did the pencil go back to California? It was on a lead search.
  • Why did the pencil use the restroom? #2.
  • What do pencils say when they want to stop working? We are drawing the line!
  • What was the first thing a blind girl lost? Her cat, her necklace, and her pencil. Her vision.
  • What did the pencil say to the doctor? “I can’t go number 2! ”
  • Sharpening pencils in the dark is pointless.
  • Are pencils still considered stationary if they can roll?
  • Why are pencils the most calm and peaceful objects? Because they never pick fights, they only draw.
  • The comedian asked the audience, ” have you heard the pencil joke yet? ” The crowd responded, “No. ” The comedian said, ” that’s good, there is no point. ”
  • What did the pencil say to the sketchbook? “You complete me.”
  • Why did the pencil become a superhero? Because it can draw attention instantly.
  • Why were the pencil and paper suspicious? Because they were sketchy.
  • Today, I stopped at the store for about ten or so minutes. When I went outside to the parking lot, there was an officer issuing citations. I said to the officer, ” Hey man, can you cut some slack here? ” He totally ignored me and kept on writing up the citation. Since he was ignoring me, I referred to him as a pencil-necked cop and I got the death stare. In return, he wrote another ticket for the air freshener hanging on the mirror. So, of course, I had to keep going, right? I asked him if his therapist could look at him in the face because he is so repulsive. He then started to draw up the third citation, and then the fourth, and then the fifth. It seemed as if the more I kept nagging him, the worse it got. To be honest with you, I wasn’t worried. My truck was parked down the street.
  • What did the pencil say to the other pencil? “Hey, you look sharp. ”
  • Why did the pencil go to dinner with the pen? Because it had a point to make.
  • Why did the pencil go on vacation? It wanted to get away from its daily scribbles.
  • What did the gun say to the pencil in a match? Draw!
  • What’s the one thing a pencil can do that a pen can’t? It can save its work by hitting ctrl+Z.

And that, folks, draws the line on our collection of 54 pencil-filled puns and jokes, each one carefully crafted to keep your laughter pencil-sharp. You’ll never run out of ways to sketch humor into your day after this! Whether you’re a seasoned art teacher or a stick-figure-drawing amateur, remember: life’s too short to erase the jokes that make you smile! Keep those funny bone tickling puns at the tip of your pencil, and don’t forget to share the lead love!