68 Hilarious River Puns That’ll Keep You Laughing Upstream

Prepare to hop on the laughter raft as we dance with words along the playful and refreshing streams of humor! This treasure trove of 68 mirthful river puns and jokes will tickle your funny bone, giving a whole new meaning to laughing riverbanks. A gushing, ever-flowing and winding course of good jokes and delightful puns, this collection promises to make anyone’s day, whether you are an innocent tadpole or a wise, old river turtle.

From cheerful chuckles to rolling-on-the-floor laughter, this humor-filled journey flows smoothly through riveting rivers, frolicking around every river bend. Acting as the rowing oar, we promise our splash of word play and punny humor will help you row against the mundane and monotony! So stay calm, stay afloat, and embrace the buoyant humor that awaits you downstream. This is your chance to dive headfirst into the roaring waterfall of mirth – because who wouldn’t want to be swept into a sea of laughter?

  • I just saw a cartoon about beavers. It was the best dam cartoon I’ve ever seen.
  • The lake held a grudge against the river because it was not lake-able.
  • What do you call the small rivers that stream into the Nile? Juveniles.
  • What did the counselor say to the wild river? You need to find your flow.
  • If you dive into shallow waters, you may jump to conclusions.
  • What do you call the country with the most dams? An Eternal Dam Nation.
  • The major difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River is that the Amazon River has tons of sails.
  • How did the great flood happen? God didn’t build a dam.
  • What do they call a squeaky river? A creek.
  • Why wouldn’t the lake date the river? It felt too stream string along.
  • A rose is a lot like a river. They’re both flowers.
  • How do lazy rivers operate? They go with the float.
  • The water was streaming down the river cheerfully when it hit a wall. It screamed, “Dam it! ”
  • Last night, the river was arrested due to illegal streaming.
  • Dried up rivers are so cool! They’re very ex-stream.
  • When my brother got hungry on the river, we stopped and got freshly made stream buns.
  • The dock floats above the lake due to peer pressure.
  • A flood can be a very scary emergenc-sea.
  • Why are rivers great storytellers? They have a good flow.
  • Why wouldn’t the hipster jump in the river? The river was too mainstream for his taste.
  • What did the river say after a tough day? I’m feeling overflown.
  • Why did the river break up with the pond? Because it felt too drained.
  • What did the doctor say to the river? Her flow wouldn’t stop.
  • When fish really need money, they always swim to the closest bank.
  • What did Sherlock say when he saw the sandstone in the river? “It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson. ”
  • My friend recently dived into a river in Paris. The verdict’s out that he is in Seine.
  • Why don’t rivers get lost? They always find a course.
  • What did Jesus say to the river? You are dammed.
  • I love tossing pennies in the river and observing them. It’s a good way to study my cash flow.
  • Why was the river never invited to parties? It always got too tanked.
  • What did the dam say when the fish swam into it? Dumb bass.
  • What did the river say to the sailor? You have my current support.
  • First there’s the Amazon River. Soon there’s gonna be the Twitter Canal or Instagram Valley.
  • Where do fish go to take a nap? The river bed.
  • Did you hear about the eviction at the river? It was rather discharging.
  • What did the ocean say to the stream? You can run but you can’t hide.
  • What is the saddest river in Southern Europe? The Crimea River.
  • Why was the river so excited? Because it found a stream of income.
  • When going on a boat trip to Greendale, we noticed that the channel didn’t look safe, so we went back to Riverdale.
  • Why didn’t the beavers collect any wood for the river? Cause they didn’t give a dam.
  • What did the generous river say? Let flow what may.
  • I try to learn how to swim every time we go to the lake. I can never get a hang of it, but my brother says it’s very swim-ple.
  • What state is the Amazon River located in? The liquid state.
  • Why did the fish go to the river bank? Because it wanted to withdraw its fins.
  • The stream was so shallow that the lake had to cut it off.
  • What happened to the curious river? It went on a stream of consciousness.
  • I love rivers so much. I started watching a livestream earlier today.
  • What happened when the river got in trouble? It was taken to water court.
  • Is there a curfew for rivers? Yes, but it’s flexible because rivers run anytime.
  • The scenery near the river valley is so beautiful. It’s practically gorges.
  • If you get tide up in your sorrows, you’ll only end up crying a river.
  • Why didn’t the overworked stream take a break? It couldn’t handle the downtime.
  • One river asked the other river, “Wat-er you doing today? ”
  • Can rivers be good at math? Absolutely, they always know what come downstream.
  • Why did the river never lose at poker? It had a great poker face.
  • A lot of my river jokes just aren’t current anymore.
  • The fisherman refused to accept that he lost his new fishing hook in the river. He was starting to be in the Nile.
  • One time a pirate flooded a tavern. Let that sink inn.
  • A banker recently drowned in a river. It was a river of cash.
  • The river never likes to play hide and seek. It always gets found downstream.
  • Why doesn’t the river like the sea? Because the sea is too salty.
  • Why did the gambler stay at the river? He heard the stakes were flowing.
  • What do you call an immature river? A stream teenager.
  • Do rivers remain friends after they part? Yes, they always stay in current.
  • Why do rivers always take the path of least resistance? They just like to go with the flow.
  • Rivers love streaming so much that they subscribe to Netflix.
  • My wife asked why our next therapy session was at a mountain river. I told her that I needed to valley date her.
  • The ocean can’t remember anything. It’s going sea-nile.

Well, that brings us to the estuary, I mean, the end of our watery journey of hilarity. If this rapid-fire fun of 68 side-splitting river puns didn’t have you laughing like a stream trickling over ticklish rocks, then we don’t know what will! Just remember, don’t let anyone tell you a joke is too ‘current’ or ‘deep’ – as long as it doesn’t have you ‘up creek without a paddle,’ it’s all in good fun. Until next time, may your laughter flow as freely as the river, and your cheeks hurt from all the smiles. Now go on, let these jokes ‘meander’ through your mind and ‘flood’ your day with joy!