66 Lock-Busting Key Puns To Unleash Your Inner Comedian

Ready to unlock a treasure chest of chuckles? Well, we’ve got just the thing for you! Warm up your wit and prepare for a door-busting session of pun-tastic enjoyment with our key-themed puns and jokes. With a total of 66 uniquely crafted knee-slappers on the list, you’ll be picking your favorites in no time!

Our hilarious make-it or break-in puns are all about keys – yes, you heard it right, keys! They’re created to unlock your funny bone and get the laughter flowing like a well-oiled lock. Whether you’re a master locksmith or someone who always loses their keys, there’s something here to tickle your funny padlock. So, don’t wait – the next paragraphs are your key to an entertaining read!

  • My friend is writing a song about getting his door lock replaced. There’s a key change at the end.
  • Thor is usually high strung. His brother, on the other hand, is Loki.
  • What should you do when you lock yourself outside your house? Talk to the lock since communication is key.
  • I got rid of my car’s AC. I’ll roll down the windows for a breeze.
  • I’ve done away with all the black keys from my piano. I intend to C Major improvement.
  • My F5 key has a lovely smell. It’s very refreshing
  • Why is it simple to sneak into Florida? Because there are plenty of keys.
  • Two police officers were hanging around outside a bar during closing time, waiting to catch drunk drivers. A man walks out of the bar, seemingly in a bad shape. He staggers; almost falling down the curb, until he reaches his car. He fumbles with his car keys for some time, dropping them a couple of times before finally unlocking the door, getting in, and driving off. The police officers decide to follow him and after tailing him for some miles, they realize his driving was perfect, and he was following all the traffic rules. Eventually, they decide to pull him over anyway. They put their siren on and the man pulls over without any hesitation. The police officers tell the man to get out of his car, and he politely does so. They check his license and find that it’s valid. Next, they subject him to a couple of sobriety tests, which he aces all of them. The two officers look at each other with confusion until one of them asks the man, “Sir, you are not drunk, right? The man replies, “No, sir. I am not. ”“Then how come you looked genuinely drunk as you left the bar? ”“I’m supposed to be tonight’s DD”“Tonight’s Designated Driver? ”“No. Not really. More like the Designated Decoy. The drunk friends I was with drove the other way”
  • The ghost took all the keys off my keyboard. I’m totally out of control and there is no escape.
  • Frodo took the keys to McDonald’s, JCPenney, Macy’s etc. and placed them on a single key ring. It was the one ring to rule the mall.
  • A slice of key lime pie in the Bahamas is $3. 50, while in Jamaica it’s $2. 75. Those are the pie-rates of the Caribbean.
  • My friend doesn’t use keys nowadays. He’s lost his locks.
  • My friend is a key worker. He picks locks.
  • Which keyboard key do pirates love? Everyone: RMe: Rrr maybe, but it be the C
  • What’s worse than locking your car keys inside your car while you’re outside an abortion clinic? Returning to the clinic to borrow a hanger.
  • Why did the keyboard see a doctor? Because it had a bad case of CAPS LOCK.
  • Why was the pianist banging her head against the keys? She was playing by ear.
  • What’s the key ingredient to a perfect Thanksgiving dinner? A Tur-key.
  • Don’t tease the door, it might get ‘key’d off’.
  • I ate a keyboard once… it wasn’t my type.
  • Last week I donated my passport, $1000, and my car keys to a homeless guy. You could see the happiness come from me as he holstered his suppressed gun.
  • The car key didn’t fit in at the party. She was too door-key.
  • Why doesn’t the car like talking to the key? It’s always starting arguments.
  • Which keyboard key does a lazy worker hate the most? The shift key.
  • I’m a locksmith, and I’m a locksmith.
  • What’s a computer’s favorite beat? The space bar.
  • Why did the elephant bring a suitcase to the zoo? Because it wanted to pack its trunk.
  • Why did the keyboard go to therapy? It had too many issues with control and escaping.
  • Why did the skeleton break into a house? It’s an expert with keys.
  • My computer has trust issues; it always asks me to verify I’m not a robot.
  • What type of key do bony people use to unlock their houses? Skeleton keys.
  • She found her laptop missing a key. She lost ctrl.
  • Why did the pepperoni fail at the lock? It wasn’t the right pizza the key.
  • What do you call a drunkard fumbling with his car keys? A taxi.
  • Why did the boy eat his homework? His computer told him it was a piece of cake.
  • Friend: Knock, KnockMe: Who’s there? Friend: ChickenMe: Chicken who? Friend: Chicken your pockets. Your keys might be there.
  • What’s the dessert of the year? Key-lime pie.
  • Why don’t computers sleep? It might affect their memory.
  • Little Kevin found his mom taking a shower and asked her, “What’s that between your legs mommy? ”His mother tells him, “That’s my keyhole. ”The following day, little Kevin finds his dad taking a shower and asks him, “What’s that between your legs daddy? ”His father tells him, “That’s my key. ”The next day, little Kevin tells his dad, “It seems like the neighbor also has a key to mommy’s keyhole. ”
  • I hid the key to my heart in a piano… you could say I’m piano-key.
  • I developed an addiction to pressing the F1 key on my laptop. I’m trying to get help.
  • My friend told me she works in a soap factory, her role being adding the key ingredient. She’s a lye-er.
  • I don’t like car keys that much. They always try to start something.
  • Singers can open doors with their talents, but burglars can do it off key.
  • Which computer key do aliens like? Space bar.
  • Why don’t keyboards ever go on strike? They have a lot of keys but no locks.
  • What’s a pianist’s favorite location for a vacation? The Florida Keys.
  • What kind of key makes it difficult to open your front door? Whiskey.
  • What do you use to open a Haunted House? A spoo-key.
  • Why did the burglar go to school? He wanted to learn his ABC keys.
  • The music teacher’s car was keyed yesterday. Luckily, the damage seems to B Minor.
  • Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
  • Why is it difficult to open a piano? Because the keys are located on the inside.
  • Why wasn’t the piano entering the house? It didn’t know which key to use.
  • I stayed up all night searching for my keys. Then it dawned on me.
  • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • Why couldn’t the bicycle find its keys? It lost its bearings.
  • What’s the main purpose of a key ring? To help you lose all your keys at once.
  • Why are computers employed? They excel at spreadsheets.
  • Knock, KnockWho’s there? Jester. Jester who? Jester minute. I’m looking for my keys.
  • What type of keys are sweet? Cookies.
  • Why did the fish sing off key? Because it wasn’t possible to tuna them.
  • What kind of key opens a banana? A mon-key.
  • A hacker stole my Microsoft Office license key. I told him, “I’ll find you, and you’ll pay for what you’ve done. You have my Word. ”
  • I have a broken keyboard. No keys work.
  • Me: Have you ever seen that 70s television program involving two detectives solving crimes over the phone? Friend: No. I can’t really recall. What’s the name of the show? Me: Star Key and Hash.

And there we have it – 66 rib-tickling key and lock puns, perfectly crafted to unlock the comedy vault in your funny bone! Whether you’re in the mood for a giggle or a guffaw, these zingers should have you rolling on the floor in fits of laughter. So remember folks, laughter is the key to happiness, so don’t lock it away. You never ‘key-know’ when you might need a good chuckle to pick your spirits up!