These 74 Hilarious Penguin Puns Will Give You the Giggles

Gather ’round, bird and humour lovers alike! We are about to embark on a chilly adventure filled with tuxedo-clad hilarity in the form of chuckle-inducing penguin puns and rip-roaringly funny jokes. These 74 comedic gems are about to hit you in the funny bone like a torpedo-shaped penguin belly flopping into icy Antarctic waters. Strap on your laughter skates; the flippers are about to hit the ‘ice’!

From waddle-worthy one-liners to penguin puns colder than a winter in the South Pole, this comical compilation is certain to make you giggle, snort, and quack up in joy! Perfect for those icy days where you need a bit of comic warmth or if you just love these toboggan-loving birds! So, throw on your puffer jacket, and let’s slide into a frenzy of freezy funnies that will make you flip(per) with laughter. As they say in Antarctica, let’s break the ‘ice’ and dive right in!

  • Why do penguins make poor passenger pigeons? Because they don’t fly.
  • Why are penguins socially awkward? Because they can’t break the ice.
  • Why don’t penguins like discussing about their weight? It’s an ice-sore subject.
  • Why do penguins never let off their guards? They always live on thin ice.
  • Why don’t penguins like talking about their diet? It’s a fishy topic.
  • Who’s the most famous rock star in penguin Antarctica? They love the rolling stones but simply adore Seal.
  • What do doctors usually give to treat penguins who are sick? Medical tweetments.
  • What do you call a penguin with a raincoat? A drizzle-taker.
  • Why aren’t penguins friendly to one another when they first meet? The need to break the ice.
  • Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks? Because they don’t have backpacks.
  • Why do penguins always look posh? Because they always wear tuxedos
  • Why do TV talk shows often talk about their pet penguins at the start of an interview? They find it really breaks the ice.
  • Why are penguins great at sales call centers? They are great cold callers.
  • Why don’t penguins make fun of each other? They don’t want to icelate anyone.
  • Why do penguins that share a nest rarely fight? They don’t want to fall out.
  • What do penguins mostly catch when fishing at night? Starfish.
  • Why do penguins wear slippers at night? They never know when they’ll capsize off the ice, and will need them to swim.
  • What do you call the Penguin basketball team who had no I in their winning team? Penguns.
  • When does a penguin have money? When it has ice in its pockets.
  • What do penguins order the most in restaurants in Mexico? Brrrrrrrr-itos.
  • Why do some penguins refuse to jump off the iceberg? They get cold feet.
  • How do penguins decide whether to stay on the ice or swim? They flipper a coin.
  • Why do penguins prefer Lipton’s? They love iced tea.
  • How do penguins get to the top of the house? They take the “ice” stairs.
  • Who did the penguins nominate to run their Navy? Admiral Byrd.
  • Why should you decline to buy a cup of coffee at Starbucks for a penguin? They prefer fish.
  • What’s the most popular drink penguins order in Starbucks? An iced cappuccino?
  • Why don’t penguins particularly like rock music? They mostly like sole.
  • Why do penguins usually carry fish in their beaks? They don’t have pockets.
  • How do penguins build a house? They just igloo it together.
  • Why do many penguins go to the movie theatre? They liked the book.
  • Why do penguins never go hungry? They eat ice burgers.
  • Who was the biggest emperor in all penguin land? Julius Freezer
  • Why don’t penguins like sitting outside in sunny weather? Because they don’t want to be melted.
  • What do penguins call their grandparents? Ice-elders.
  • Why don’t penguins like talking to strangers at parties? They find it hard to break the ice.
  • What causes penguins to go black and white and round and round? Revolving doors.
  • What do female penguins wear at the beach? They usually prefer to wear a beak-ini.
  • Why did the penguin go to the party? Because he was a cool dude.
  • Did you hear about the new penguins only movie theatre? It’s called a dive-in.
  • Why do penguins love to see magicians? Because they often say Pick a cod, any cod.
  • Have you got your date for the penguin dance? They call it a snow-bowl.
  • Why does Nike sell so few shoes to penguins? Because they prefer flipper-flops.
  • Why were the penguins disappointed when the Navy icebreaker appeared? There weren’t any seals aboard.
  • What is a penguin’s favorite relative? Aunt Arctica.
  • What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost.
  • Why are penguins often turned down at restaurants? Because of the signs that say “no shoes, no service”.
  • Why did the penguins take their kids to see the Disney movie dozens of times? They love Frozen.
  • Why should you pick a penguin rather than a horse at the races? They are always in the Pole position.
  • What do penguins order most at MacDonald’s? Ice-burgers.
  • Why didn’t the penguin go to college? Because he wanted to stay cool.
  • How do scientists pick out the happiest penguins? They are the ones who have a pen-grin.
  • Why do penguins run in front of snowmobiles? To prove they aren’t chicken.
  • What do you call an adventurous penguin? An ex-plorer.
  • Why are penguins such easy-going birds? They go with the floe.
  • Why don’t penguins play hide and seek? Because they are afraid of being ice-olated.
  • What do you call a penguin with a large flat screen TV? An Ice-olated viewer
  • Did you hear about the new wallets for penguins? It’s called a snowbank.
  • Why aren’t penguins found in the desert? Because they rarely get lost.
  • Why did the two penguins jump when they first met? They were trying to break the ice.
  • What do penguins sing at retirement parties? “Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow. ”
  • How did the penguin order his alcohol? On the rocks.
  • Why are there so few penguin pilots? They aren’t tall enough to meet the entrance requirements.
  • What did the penguin use to make a snow house? Ig-glue.
  • What’s the most popular store in Antarctica for penguins who lose their tail? A re-tale store.
  • What’s another name for really cold penguins? Brrr-ds.
  • Why do many penguins wear glasses? They have poor ice-sight.
  • Why is the sea such a popular place with penguins? Because they generate plenty of waves.
  • Why are penguins good race drivers? Because they always stay chill.
  • How do most penguins pass their driver’s test? They wing it.
  • Why are male penguins so popular with girls? Because they are ice guys.
  • Why do penguins not like polar bears? They are polar opposites.
  • What do you call a penguin who falls down a hill? Black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white
  • Why are there so few penguins in Great Britain? Penguins are scared of Wales.

Well, you survived, or shall we say waddled through, our giggletastic list of 74 penguin puns and jokes! As you can tell, we flipper-out shamelessly when it comes to punny penguin humor. So, whether you’re in the mood to break the ice at a party or just chill out with some lighthearted humor, remember, penguins are always a good way to lighten the mood. Until our next joke escapade, we bid you adieu with a hearty Stay cool and keep laughing!