Ready to squeal in delight? We’ve truffle-shuffled our way through an avalanche of porcine puns and hog-heavy hilarity to bring you a list drenched in comedy gravy. Eighty-four, to be exact, all tailored to have you rolling in the aisles, rather than the mud. So, whether your funny bone is a seasoned comedian or just a wee piglet, there’s something here to send you into fits of laughter that’s sweeter than a bucketful of swill.
We’re not telling porkies when we say these piggy puns and jocular jests could even make a boar laugh. They’re perfect for sharing at family gatherings, cracking up friends, or simply indulging in a stye of humor that’ll have you grunting with glee. So, sit back, put your trotters up and prepare to oink out loud as you delve into our sizzling serving of swine-themed silliness. It’s prime rib-tickling entertainment guaranteed to make your day squealing good!
How does a pig decorate its house? With hogs and kisses.
What type of ice cream does a pick like to eat? Hoggin Daz.
What do you call a pig who takes Karate lessons? A pork chop.
What is a pig’s favorite desert? Mississippi mud pie.
Where do pigs love to vacation? The Bah-ham-mas.
What type of pig has no legs? A ground hog.
What’s a pig’s favorite candy? Gummy boars.
What do you call a pig who works at the Post Office? Porkmaster General.
What type of vehicle took the pig to the hospital? The ham-bulance.
Why did the pig fall during the race? He pulled his hamstring.
Who’s the most famous fashion designer pig? Calvin Swine.
What is a pig’s favorite car brand? Porkchevy.
Where did the pig leave his truck? The porking lot.
Why does the pig always lose at poker? Because he is a total card boar!
Why did the pig receive a flag during the football game? He was playing too dirty.
What is a laundromat for pigs called? A hogwash!
What was the pig crying at the beach? I’m bacon!
What do you call a fighting group of pigs? A hambush.
Why did the pig get his license taken away? He was a road hog.
What do you call a baby pig with a sore throat? Disgruntled.
Why was the pig afraid to cross the road? He was a slow-pork.
What do you call a ballet with pig dancers? Swine Lake.
Where does a flying pig go? Hogwarts.
What kind of houses do pigs live in? Sty-scrapers.
How can a pig send a secret message? Using invisible oink.
Why did the pig lose his job? Insu-boar-dination.
What did the little pig dress up as on Halloween? Frankenswine.
Why do pigs love reading storybooks? There’s always a twist in the tale.
What do you call a pig doing volunteer work? A philanthropig.
What do you call a pig crossed with a centipede? Bacon and legs.
What do pigs wear to the beach? Pigkinis.
Why are pigs perfect employees? They always finish their tasks before they swine down.
Who is the most famous pig artist? Pigcasso.
What is the name of the smartest pig to ever live? Ein-swine.
What do you call a pig applying for an auto loan? A boar-erer.
‘What’s a pig’s favorite rollercoaster? The Ham-merhead.
Why did the pig became a baker? He’s best at making ham-burgers.
What do you call a pig that’s infested with fleas? Pork scratchings.
How does a pig propose to its girlfriend? Will you mar-hog me?
What would you call a pig crossed with a dinosaur? Jurassic Pork.
Why don’t pigs play cards? Because they are afraid of cheetahs and wolves.
How does a pig greet you in French? Bon-swine.
Knock KnockWho’s there? PigPig who? Remember to pig me up tonight!
What did the pig say during the heatwave? I’m bacon out here.
What did the pig say when he hurt his leg? Call a hambulance.
Where do pigs go to visit the Statue of Liberty? New Pork City.
What do you call a pig that’s been stabbed? Porkchopped.
Why do pigs want to avoid growing up? It’s boar-ing being an adult.
What do you call a pig playing basketball? A ball hog.
What do you call pigs competing in the Olympics? The Olympigs.
Where does a pig hide its money? The piggy bank.
Why should pigs never rob a bank? They squeal.
What do you call a pig eating a watermelon? Pork rinds.
What does a pig use to clean its table? Hamkins.
Why did the brother and sister pig get into a fight at dinner? He was hogging all the food.
What kind of vehicle did the pig buy? A pig-up truck.
What happens when a pig plays tug of war? Pulled pork.
What’s the pig’s best defense in a court? Trial by swine!
How do you help a sick pig feel better? Give him oinkment.
What do pigs love to do in the summertime? Have a pig-nic.
Why did the pig fail his test? He was mistaken bacon.
What’s a pig’s favorite thing to do at the casino? Play the slop machines.
What do you call a pig crossed with a cactus? Porky-pine!
What do you call a pig that shoplifts? A hamburglar.
Why was the pig so good at basketball? He was a total swine dunk!
What would you call a pig that has three eyes? A piiig.
How does a family of pigs show their love? Hogs and kisses.
What kind of medicine does a sick pig need? Oinkment.
How does a pig start a race? Squeal.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They’ll hog all your covers.
What’s a pig’s favorite karaoke song? Swine Me Up, Before You Go Go.
If a pig could vote, who would it choose? Abra-ham Lincoln.
What did the pig friends say to each other? We should be pen pals.
What do you call a pig that’s good at soccer? Ham-messi.
Why can’t pigs fly? The price of pork will skyrocket.
What do pigs have to do after school? Their hamwork.
How does a pig write a secret message? With a boar code.
What do you do when the pig pen breaks? Use the pig pencil.
What Shakespeare play did the pig buy tickets to? Ham-let.
What does a pig need to bring to the beach? A surf-boar-d.
What is a pig’s favorite holiday? Valenswine’s Day.
What is a pig’s favorite Ballet? The Nutcracker Swine.
What’s a pig’s favorite 80’s band? Duran Dur-ham.
Why was the pig picking his nose? He had too many hamboogers.
We hope you’ve had a rollicking good time snorting in hilarity over this mighty compilation of pig puns and jokes! From the bellyaching 84th right down to the chuckle-inducing first one, we’ve left no hog unturned in our quest for some good old-fashioned farmland funnies. Don’t let yourself wallow in sadness if the laughter has come to an end; just remember, no matter the trot or situation, there is always a pig joke somewhere that will bring home the bacon! Till our next swine soiree of silliness, don’t pork-get to share these rib-ticklers and keep the laughter piggybank overflowing.
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