44 Window Puns That’ll Have You Rolling in the Aisles

Welcome, pun-cravers and humor hounds, to the most pane-fully funny collection of jokes we guarantee you’ll be hanging on! This hilariously translucent compilation is all about windows – yes, you read that right, windows! We’ve cracked open the vault and let some fresh air in on our funniest, silliest, and most clever window themed puns and jokes.

With a total of 44 of these sparkling quips waiting for to you have a peek at, we assure you, your laughter is just a window away! Perfect for parties, ice-breakers, or just to lift your spirits on a day you’re feeling a bit fogged up. So draw the curtains, let in some light, and gear up for laughs, because these punch lines are so funny, they’re simply smashing!

  • Why did the window flunk geography? It couldn’t locate the sills
  • What did the window reply when it was asked for its phone number? Sorry, I am pane free
  • Never waste a window of opportunity when you see one. They could be a real pane to replace.
  • A pigeon flew against the side of my house the other day and now I have a stained glass window in my office.
  • It was parents’ career day at my school today and I brought my dad. When asked why he chose to be a window cleaner for his career choice, he simply replied that it was the only job that he ever saw himself doing and he enjoyed reflecting on it.
  • Why was the window considered wise? Because it’s seen more sunsets than anyone else
  • A curious boy sat alone in his room. Bored, he decided to throw his clock out the window, which hit his mom’s car. When she inevitably found the clock and came to ask the boy why his clock was in the driveway, he told her that he just wanted to see time fly.
  • What happens when you tell a window a joke? It cracks up.
  • It’s easy enough to climb through the window on the first floor, but a window on the second floor? That’s an entirely different story.
  • Why did the Ninja Turtles throw Shredder out of their office window? Because they fought all the time.
  • What do you call a story written about a broken window? A draft.
  • Why did the window go to the therapist? It was tired of people seeing right through it
  • Why did the window shade get an award? Because it pulled itself up
  • The neighbor told me their window was smashed today. I asked them what happened and they said that someone used a potato to gain entry to the house, but the police suspect the evidence was planted.
  • Why did the window call the plumber? Because it had a leak
  • How did the computer catch such a breeze? Someone left all of its windows open.
  • Why did the window refuse the flowers? It already had planty
  • A thief was caught stealing windows in the neighborhood. When the police questioned him to find out what he was doing with all the windows, he said it was a real pane to describe.
  • Why was the window amazing at making decisions? Sophisticated windows aren’t fabricated, they’re made
  • Why did the window never play hide n seek? Because it always gets spotted
  • Why couldn’t the new window find its parents? Because they were pane-less
  • What becomes of  a window covering that has exhausted its usefulness? It turns into a yawning!
  • What do you get when you use water to clean the windows? Light.
  • My wife and I were driving down the road today when a bug hit the windshield. Without skipping a beat, I gave her a sideways glance and said “I bet he doesn’t have the stomach to try that again. ”
  • Mr. Gates and Mr. Schwarzenneger met at a celebrity gathering and Mr. Gates can’t help being curious if Schwarzenneger has upgraded to the latest version of windows. He approaches Arnold and asks pointedly if he has tried the new windows yet, to which Arnold replies “No not yet, I still love the old Vista baby! ”
  • While renovating the bathroom, I accidentally knocked out the window. Later that evening, my techy girlfriend asked why the bathroom window was missing while we were getting ready for bed and I simply replied “oopsie poopsie, I accidentally uninstalled windows” and flicked off the light.
  • When we moved into our new house, my wife and I debated between curtains or blinds for the windows. She went away for the weekend and I decided to take the initiative and got curtains up on all of them. When she came home, she had blinds with her which she threw at me. I don’t get why she had to throw shade at me for my efforts.
  • I broke a window the other day and attempted to put in a new one by myself, but it was just such a pane.
  • Why did the window enroll in the gym? To stop being fragile and get pane strong
  • Why did the widow and the window become best friends? Because both could feel the pain and the pane
  • What’s a window’s favorite breakfast? Glass of juice and white toast
  • Why did the window go to the bank? To get its sheets in order
  • Why was the window the best student in art class? It was best at shading
  • I came home to a broken window in my room today. It seems someone had used part of a brick to smash it from the street. I called the police but they said there wasn’t enough concrete evidence to catch the culprit.
  • How do you make a window soundproof? You have to give it the silent treatment.
  • How does a window take its coffee? It likes it in a glass, frosted
  • Words of wisdom from my grandfather: Never fight a window installer. They can really bring the pane.
  • What does a window wear to a costume party? Screen masks
  • Why did the window get in trouble with its parents? It stayed open too late
  • Why did the window receive high grades? Because he was good at framing his arguments
  • How does a window exhibit dominance? By showing it’s tint
  • Why was the window offered a raise at work? Because it was so transparent and upfront
  • Why was the window happy in the summer? Because it gets a constant breeze
  • Why was the window always gossipping? Because it always saw everything

Well, we’ve reached the end of the pane and now it’s time to wind down. We hope that these 44 window puns really opened up your views on humor and made you smile like a window on a sunny day! Keep these jokes on the sill for when you need a little daylight in your day or want to break the glass ceiling of seriousness. Just remember, when it comes to laughter, the “sky-light” is the limit! Thanks for hanging around, don’t let the curtains hit you on the way out!