47 Hilarious Time Travel Puns That Will Warp Your Future Laughs

Prepare yourself for an uproarious, time-twisting ride through our universe of laughter! As you embark on this journey strewn with 47 side-splitting time travel puns and jokes, you’ll find yourself warping through comedic wormholes, laughing paradoxes, and giggle-inducing alternate realities. It’s all fair game when hours, minutes, and centuries start mingling!

Don’t worry about packing your bags or updating your passport; all you need is your sense of humor! Just as the time travelers we’ll be joking about, be prepared to skip across the time-space continuum of hilarity, where the past, the present, and the future collide—causing a timeless sonic boom of laughter! Fasten your seat belts and brace for impact from these hilarious jabs and jests at the concept of time travel. One thing is guaranteed: your future will be far from lacking in laughs!

  • The worst way to learn I’m adopted is that I invented time travel and killed my grandfather to see if I wouldn’t be born.
  • The next meeting of the community time travel group has been put off until last month.
  • What did the time traveler say to his echo? Stop copying me from the past!
  • That joke that I heard about tomorrow, was a time travel one.
  • You can travel back in time! The United States of America has just gone back 50 years!
  • Why did the time traveler stop wearing watches? He wanted to break free from the hands of time.
  • Why is time travel a great business? It’s always ahead of time.
  • Why was the time traveler always bored? He already knew how every moment would play out.
  • Why didn’t the time traveler show up for dinner? Apparently, he had already eaten in the future.
  • I used to be obsessed with traveling through time, but that is now all history.
  • The air was tense when the past, present, and future walked into the bar.
  • In lieu of attempting to kill Adolf Hitler and disrupting the timeline, a time traveler meets Hitler in a bar and decides to have a drink with him. Hitler was confronted by the time traveler, who inquired, “How is it going? How are you? ” “Pretty awful, I just got kicked out of art school, ” she replied. “Well, that’s bad, but you’ll probably get up eventually, ” replied Hitler.  “You’re correct, but you want to know what I detest? ” The time traveler stated. “My wild assumption would be the Jews correct? ” Hitler asked.  The time traveler then replied, “Well, now that you’ve brought it up…”
  • Why do time travelers hate fast food? It’s always too slow for their timeline.
  • What does a time traveller do when he’s cold? He goes to the time when it was hot.
  • Did you know that tomatoes are really time travelers? They have worm holes.
  • Why didn’t the sun and the clock get along? Because time and light travel differently.
  • What’s a time traveler’s favorite moment of the day? The present.
  • The time traveler goes back four seconds because he was starving.
  • I’m selling a time machine. Please contact me two weeks ago if interested.
  • You didn’t like my time travel joke before.
  • Why is time travel so disappointing? You realize there’s no perfect when.
  • Why can’t time travelers simply exist? Because they’re always moving forward.
  • A strange man that came out of a time machine punched me in the face when I was a young boy. I’m finally going to be able to create my own time machine, so I’m going to go back to when he was a young boy to punch him and see how he reacts.
  • Why don’t time travellers ever procrastinate? Because they always think they can do it yesterday.
  • The note on the classroom door stated that time travel class starts at 1930.
  • Cutlery is not able to time travel. The reason being is they are not called silverwhen, they are called silverware.
  • “Apologies, but we do not serve time travelers in this very pub, ” the owner declares. Time moves on. The owner eventually ages and passes away. Then, his children grew old and followed suit. The city is demolished due to time and war, and new cities are built on top of the old ones, then fall apart too. The earth takes back the human body as it ages and reclaims its bones. The cracked land, where the few traces of life remain, is only a pallid shade of red when the sun expends its energy. “Well shoot, I definitely overshot the punchline on this one, ” The time traveler states as he looks around at the empty, lonesome landscape.
  • “Many apologies but we certainly do not serve time travelers here, ” the bartender says. A time traveler enters a pub.
  • What do you call a machine that is able to produce futuristic herbs? A thyme machine.
  • If you’re dating a time traveler, be careful not to fall for their future self.
  • Why did the time traveler go to school? To learn the dates.
  • Why don’t time travelers worry about public speaking? They’ve already heard all the reactions.
  • I intended to make a joke about traveling through time, but nobody laughed.
  • What does a time traveler say when he’s confused? It’s about time I figured this out.
  • A bounty hunter that is best known for time travel is the Mandelorian.
  • A time machine was built by a procrastinator. Actually, not yet, but he intends to begin last week.
  • The time traveler was so upset, he couldn’t even manage a second.
  • When he inquired about my status as a time traveler, I replied, “Not right now. ”
  • I am pleased to report that I received the award for “Class of 2065, most likely to travel in time. ”
  • Why do time travelers never lose in a fight? Because they can always turn back time.
  • Why don’t time travelers need the internet? Because they’re already connected to the world wide wait.
  • Why is a time traveler like a book? They both have many stories to tell.
  • Very close friends with the other people in my club who travel through time and we go back many, many years.
  • I tried to create a time travel joke, but it ended up being too ahead of its time.
  • When an overweight time traveler arrives in ancient Rome, he discovers that he was dressed incorrectly for the occasion. As a result, he shops for new clothes at a toga shop. He looks around and sees that they don’t have any togas that are big enough for him. He inquires of the employee at the counter, “Do you happen to have the size XL in togas? ” The employee responds, “Well, yes. However, why do you require so many? ”
  • Why do time travelers make poor secretaries? They already know all the minutes of the meeting.
  • Why did the time traveller break up with his girlfriend? She constantly brought up his time-travelling past.

Having journeyed together through these 47 witty time-travel puns, it’s high time to dock our DeLorean DMC-12, stow away our TARDIS, and step back into the present where, sadly, the only time travel possible is the relentless march forward! Let’s assure ourselves that we’ve filled our laughter reserves to last until we invent real time machines, letting us revisit the fun, anytime we desire. Remember, nothing instills ‘past’-positive vibes like a good pun. So feel free to ‘future’-lessly share these rib ticklers with others and multiply the fun. After all, laughter, like time travel, knows no boundaries!